In Afghanistan, there were little things I missed every day. Flannel
pajamas. Starbucks white chocolate mochas. Paved roads. The sound of the ocean.
Guacamole. Thinking of these things reminded me that I wasn’t home.
Then there were bigger things that I missed terribly, desperately,
things that didn’t gnaw at me on a daily basis but that, when a thought or
memory struck, could cripple me with sadness. Thinking of these things reminded
me that I was missing life.
I missed my family, of course. A sticky note on a Christmas tin full of
homemade cookies brought me to tears. I wasn’t there for the birth of my twin
nieces; “Auntie Wowen” was introduced much later to giggling six month olds. I wasn’t
there for the wedding of a longtime friend. I missed every
major holiday.
And I missed the Olympics.
I’ve always loved the Olympics. My childhood could be measured in four-year
increments . . . then later, after 1994, by twos. Primetime Olympic coverage
was family time in the Johnson household. I remember cheering when Dan Jansen
finally stayed on his feet to win speed skating gold, when Kerri Strug stuck a
one-footed vault landing to ensure the women’s gymnastics team the top spot on
the podium, when local 16-year-old swimmer Megan Quann made brash predictions
of beating the world’s best 100M breaststroker on the world’s biggest stage –
and then did.
With two parent athletes, two athlete siblings and my own delusions of
swimming grandeur, Olympic fandom is in my blood. I love the grace and
athleticism. I love the stories of struggle and perseverance, of overcoming
seemingly insurmountable odds. I love the unity among teams and among nations.
I love the badass, muscle-bound, tougher-than-nails athletes who can’t help but
cry when their national anthem plays. I love the theme music. I love Bob Costas.
I never saw Bob in winter 2010. From a grainy Armed Forces Network satellite
feed on a TV in the corner of the Forward Operating Base Gardez chow hall, I
caught snippets of curling and women’s hockey – the only two events that seemed
to play during meal time (and, unfortunately, not my favorites). I didn’t watch
Evan Lysacek become the first U.S. male figure skating champion since 1988, or
Lindsey Vonn win the first ever U.S. gold in women’s downhill skiing. I didn’t
hear any inspiring rags to riches stories, or see a single medal presentation. Perhaps
worst of all, I couldn’t share favorite moments with my parents and siblings.
More than a sharp break in a lifelong tradition, missing the Olympics
was a reminder of everything else I was missing. It was a realization that life
moves fast, and in America, in Vancouver, around the world, it was moving
without me. I missed a year of holidays, a year of news (Swine Flu! Haiti
Earthquake!), a year of pop culture (who is this Gaga person and what is she wearing?), a year of technological
advancements (what happened to two dimensional entertainment? Do they still make
cell phones with buttons?), a year of people and places I love growing and
changing. Without me.
I by no means regret volunteering for my deployment, so you could say I
don’t regret, as a result, missing 349 days of life. And I guess I don’t. In
some ways, though, I’m still working to make peace with it. Not only did the
world change, but so did I – we spent a year growing up separately; we’re
still getting reacquainted.
But I suppose in the same way time pulls you apart from people, places
and experiences, it also stitches you back together.
In two years, I’ve seen several 3D movies and upgraded (and become
hopelessly addicted) to a smartphone. I’m caught up on current events. Lady
Gaga’s crazy outfits on magazine covers no longer freak me out. I no longer
freak my nieces out. I’ve had the kind of quality visits with family and
friends you can only have when making up for lost time.
And for the next two weeks I’m going to get reacquainted with my
childhood Olympic tradition – only this time my viewing will be technologically-enhanced
with a flatscreen TV and the power of DVR!
Living proof that change isn’t always bad . . .
GO TEAM USA!
Okay seriously...what is she wearing???
Lady Gaga (AP) |
Great post! By the way, missing Lady Gaga seems alright to me... :D
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